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I was there when no one was watching

Posted July 07th, 2026

To those who say I wasn't there, I answer: I was there when no one was watching.

For me, being at Siracusa Pride is not a gesture, not a photo op, not a name on a poster.

It is the continuation of a journey I began 53 years ago, when, at 13 years old, I arrived alone in San Francisco and the LGBTQ+ community took me by the hand and taught me that diversity is not something to hide, but to embrace.

And when I speak of community, I mean the entire community, without distinctions.

Gay, lesbian, trans. For me, it has always been this way.

And I'm not saying this today because it's trendy. I'm saying it because I have the scars to prove it.

In 1981, at 21 years old, I sang:

Who is Vanessa the vamp?

She's a butterfly that once

Was just a courtyard caterpillar

That was so long ago

She took her savings and ran away

To Casablanca and tried on

A beautiful body to wear

A real novelty.

Who do you think a 21-year-old girl was speaking to, in an Italy that didn't even know how to pronounce the word "trans"?

Back then, there were no likes on social media, and no easy catwalks.

There was only the courage to step onto a stage and say, without shouting but through gestures: I am here for you too.

And when I returned from those appearances, do you know what I found? Scolding. Judgmental looks. Words that told me: "Don't do it, Heather."

But I did it anyway.

I know that in recent days there has been a lot of talk about me. And I know that some of my words, taken out of the context of an entire lifetime, have sparked debate.

If anyone has perceived distance or misunderstanding, I am sorry. Because that was never my intention to push anyone away.

And let me be clear about one thing, because sincerity is the only path I know. My statement, as strong as it was, was limited to the physiological aspect. A person's soul has nothing to do with their biology.

But if there's one thing I've learned in 53 years of walking with this community, it's that respect for diversity is not built with labels. It is built with glances, with gestures, with presence.

And I have done so for an entire lifetime, with my opinions, with my limitations, with my humanity.

In years when being on the side of this community gave no popularity, no visibility, nothing except the joy of being who you are. And that joy, for me, is still everything.

Diversity is not a value you can stretch or shrink at will. It is not a suit you wear for one night and take off the next day. Diversity is a commitment. It is a pact that we build together, even when we don't agree on everything.

And true diversity passes through dialogue. Through tolerance. Through confrontation, even when it's uncomfortable. Even when it's difficult. Never through hatred.

I am coming to Siracusa to celebrate the entire LGBTQ+ community. Every person. Every story. Every identity. Without exceptions, without exclusions, without distinctions. I will be there to embrace anyone who wants to be embraced. To dance with those who want to dance. To shake the hand of those who have walked longer than I have.

Without distinctions. Without fear. With love.

Heather Parisi

23 comments

July 07th, 2026 10:16

This piece is really powerful. It's so easy for people to criticize from the sidelines now, but Heather's words about her history and genuine commitment really hit home. It reminds me that true allyship isn't about social media points, but about consistent action, even when it's hard. There's no Block Blast for this kind of dedication.

July 11th, 2026 11:21

That long-standing commitment should not be erased because of one controversial comment, especially if there is a genuine effort to explain the intended meaning and apologize for any hurt caused. At the same time, good FNF intentions do not automatically prevent words from having a negative impact. Listening to those who feel affected and engaging in respectful dialogue is an important part of maintaining trust.

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August 24th, 2026 06:20

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September 24th, 2026 14:06

Your words carry the weight of real experience, Heather. It's powerful how you’ve stood by the LGBTQ+ community not for visibility, but from lived truth since long before it was accepted. That 1981 performance was brave in a time when few understood. Today, sharing such moments authentically matters more than ever—especially when preserving original audio intent, like using tools to Remove Background Music from video for clearer storytelling. Your journey deserves to be heard exactly as it happened.

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September 28th, 2026 11:15

Lo spazio commenti è uno spazio web (lo "Spazio") presente sul blog di Heather Parisi che consente agli utenti di inserire a titolo gratuito i propri commenti in uno spazio autogestito e di renderli quindi pubblici. Con l'immissione dei propri commenti nell'apposito Spazio l'utente prende atto ed accetta che gli stessi saranno automaticamente ospitati e memorizzati nello Spazio e, tramite quest'ultimo, diffusi on-line via Internet. L'utente prende atto che lo Spazio è dotato di limitata capacità di memoria di conseguenza la pubblicazione e la permanenza dei commenti sullo Spazio non sono garantite da Heather Parisi.
Heather Parisi, pertanto, potrà sospendere e/o interrompere o rimuovere la pubblicazione on-line dei commenti presenti sullo Spazio in qualunque momento senza assumere alcun tipo di responsabilità per l'eventuale sospensione, interruzione, e/o rimozione nè per ritardi o cattivo funzionamento dello Spazio da qualsiasi causa siano essi derivati.
Heather Parisi non garantisce nè si assume responsabilità alcuna circa l'esattezza, la completezza, e in generale il contenuto dei commenti inseriti dagli utenti nello Spazio. La responsabilità per l'invio e la pubblicazione è a carico dell'utente il quale, utilizzando il servizio, prende atto che Heather Parisi è esonerata da qualsiasi onere di preventivo accertamento o controllo sui contenuti immessi nello Spazio, o sui contenuti dei siti web ai quali lo Spazio rinvia per il tramite di links e non assume alcuna responsabilità per il contenuto e/o il materiale, anche pubblicitario, divulgato su tali siti o per i prodotti o servizi offerti. Tali prodotti o servizi non possono considerarsi in alcun modo offerti, pubblicizzati, promossi o sponsorizzati da Heather Parisi e pertanto l'Utente assume ogni responsabilità per ogni attività eventualmente effettuata in relazione a detti prodotti o servizi.
In ogni caso, Heather Parisi avrà facoltà di monitorare l'attività dello Spazio e di accedere ai contenuti immessi sul web tramite lo Spazio, in ogni momento e senza preavviso, per verificare il rispetto delle presenti condizioni di utilizzo. In caso di violazione delle presenti condizioni di utilizzo o di diritti di terzi, Heather Parisi potrà assumere i necessari provvedimenti, ivi inclusa l'eventuale sospensione o interruzione del servizio e la segnalazione alle Autorità competenti.
Nessuna indennità o risarcimento sarà dovuto all'Utente per i contenuti che Heather Parisi abbia deciso a suo insindacabile giudizio di rimuovere o non ospitare nello Spazio.
L'utente dichiara e garantisce di aver compiuto la maggiore età e che i contenuti immessi sullo Spazio sono; a) leciti, corretti e conformi alla legge, ai principi dell'ordine pubblico e del buon costume; (b) non contengono forme e/o contenuti di natura offensiva, ingiuriosa, diffamatoria, calunniosa, erotica, pornografica, pedopornografica, blasfema, volgare od oscena o che incoraggino comportamenti in qualsiasi modo illegittimi o aventi lo scopo di recare molestia alla quiete pubblica o privata; (c) non violano alcun segno distintivo, diritto di proprietà intellettuale, industriale o altro diritto di terzi, nè alcuna norma giuridica vigente. (d) sono originali, nella piena disponibilità dell'utente.
L'utente, prende atto che è punito ai sensi della Legge 22 aprile 1941 n. 633 chiunque, senza averne diritto, elabora, riproduce, trascrive, duplica, distribuisce o comunica opere di proprietà intellettuale e che eventuale materiale protetto da copyright può essere immesso attraverso i commenti sullo Spazio solo qualora siano stati acquisiti, dal titolare del diritto d'autore, i connessi diritti di utilizzazione, quindi solo con il permesso scritto del titolare del diritto e con l'obbligo di citare la fonte e l'esistenza del premesso. Per tali motivi l'utente è consapevole che è l'unico destinatario di eventuali azioni giudiziali o cautelari da parte di terze persone in relazione alla condotta o alla modalità di utilizzo dei commenti immessi nello Spazio. Pertanto egli è tenuto a tenere indenne e manlevare Heather Parisi, sostanzialmente e processualmente, da ogni pregiudizio, perdita, danno, responsabilità, costo, onere, spese (incluse anche spese legali) derivante da qualsivoglia pretesa e/o domanda e/o azione (sia di carattere risarcitorio e/o a titolo di indennizzo) che sia stata e/o possa essere avanzata, nei confronti di Heather Parisi, in qualunque sede, da parte di terzi, in relazione alla pubblicazione e diffusione sullo Spazio dei commenti, inviati e immessi dall'utente stesso.
L'utilizzo del servizio potrebbe comportare il trattamento dei dati personali dell'utente da parte di Heather Parisi per lo svolgimento delle necessarie attività.
Con l'invio dei commenti nello Spazio l'utente accetta quanto detto sopra ed esprime il più ampio consenso all'utilizzo degli stessi, compresa la loro riproduzione e la diffusione da parte di Heather Parisi, nonchè al trattamento dei dati personali ai sensi del Codice della Privacy (D.Lgs.196/2003).

September 28th, 2026 11:16

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